Everyone everywhere everyday is asking this question.
“How are you?” Or “How ya doin’?” Or “How’s your day going?”
Do you ever wish you could just reply honestly? Last week, I went to the grocery store and got ready to check out. I cringed and waited for the cashier to, on cue, ask it.
“How are you?”
There it was. She asked it and, although it was completely expected, the mere sound of the words made me want to burst out in tears.
I wanted to just reply, “Terrible! I am having a terrible day!” But of course I bit my tongue and replied with the cordial but inverse answer, “Good. How are you?”
Asking the 3 dreaded words in return made me want to lose my lunch. Here I am mindlessly uttering the same thing back. I hated that I was being part of society’s scripted exchange and that made my stomach turn some more.
I was lost in the monotony of the register’s beeping as all the items went by on the conveyor belt. Why do we ask each other this question if we really don’t care to get an honest answer? Maybe we do care to get an honest answer but we’ve been trained as a society to pretend everything is fine. Is there something else we can ask that’s not as triggering?
That’s when it occurred to me that every single person you encounter is going through something. Everyone has something that is weighing them down whether it’s big or small and it matters to them. I don’t currently have an alternate greeting to propose but when I do have something less provoking I will make sure to write a blog post on that. In the meantime, we need to remind ourselves to have more patience and understanding with the people we encounter. Although we say we’re doing well, everyone is not ‘good.’
“with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another through love" Ephesians 4:2